Smile,Baby
by mellowyellow36
Summary: freddy zack slash,1st chapter present,2ed chapter,begining of junior year,all following chapters,4 months in sequence.I hope you all like it!
1. imagination

"Zack…"there was no response. That probably wasn't good, especially with them fighting so much lately. I looked at the clock reading 1:09 am, and rolled over.

Zack was gone. Shit. This was a _major_ cause for panic. Images flashed though my mind of the last time Zack did this. They had almost lost him because of all the blood loss. I shot out of the tangled covers, running into the kitchen expecting to see Zack slicing his newly healed wrists open with a heavy knife, surprisingly finding it empty. I turn on my heel to face the living room, to see Zack sitting balled upon the black leather couch he adored to sleep in, no matter how comfortable the bed seemed, very immerged in a thick girly romance novel, and, he was crying, gently.

I walked over to him and sat down on the arm of the couch. I reached out and touched Zack's tear streaked cheek and Zack raised his big brown eyes, still slightly teary. "Hey babe, what's wrong?" I spoke; upset at the way my voice seemed to be so carefree. "How could she?" I assumed he was talking about how some sultry woman in the book slept with her husbands best friend. "She… killed herself" I was silent. This was something Zack would have a lot of opinion on, and I wasn't it a hurry to make him cry more. "But he loved her…how could she do that to him?" he continued sounding like he did in sixth grade when they told him his own mother had bled herself away in a mental hospital. _You don't understand, that was supposed to keep her safe…_

I looked into his eyes and told him, "I'm not sure, tell me." I could almost see his heart breaking in shame, he looked away from me and started to cry "I… I didn't think about that okay! I wasn't thinking about your feelings, I only wanted out! You have no idea what I needed…"he was going to say more, but I slid down next to him and held him tight to my chest. I was never losing him again. "I needed _you_…" he whispered into my chest.

"Well now you have me. Forever." He looked up at me and almost smiled. I wish he would. "I'm not going anywhere" he said just above a whisper .I wiped away his tears and pushed him down onto the leather. I kissed his forehead, the tip of his nose, his jaw line and his perfect pale lips. He kissed back with passion he hadn't shown me in months. Maybe, even if he wasn't happy yet, I had a feeling he would be soon.

Later as I held him in my arms, unknowingly thinking he was sleeping at last ,I looked out the wall sized window we lived here for. All the outer layer apartments had glass walls that looked like there were out of a fairy tale ,and you could adjust the appearance of the glass to be tinted or clear or finely cracked into tiny pieces, state of the art, made for the modern rock stars. Zack always kept it clear, clean as possible. Freddy looked across the gap to the identical building to see a girl being thrown across the room by her drunk boyfriend. He left the room, and she slid down the glass holding her head in her hands sobbing freely. She looked up out the window and caught my eyes. I gave her a sympathetic look and she saw Zack in my arms and smiled. I knew that smile. Bright and sunny.

I guess in a way she was Zack, a few years ago, and hopefully her boyfriend will wake up soon too, and help her but until then, she smiled. 

And only if I had been looking at Zack I would have noticed, for the first time in 3 years, he genuinely smiled.


	2. sorry

I'm so sorry to put you thought that, I'll try to figure out how to fix it up some more, but I was really sleepy and pissed when I wrote that, sorry about the POV change, I stopped with Freddy's pov for a while without realizing it! I'm so sorry! Don't hate me…


	3. mirror

Ok! I just realized ,I don't have a disclaimer! okay then, I own school of rock. So there.

HA.

But, I **also** do have a chain leash!

This is like a look in the rearview mirror, in the junior year of HS. When everything starts really going wrong. Well, I thought I'd try Katie on for size…here goes…

I was feeling rather lonely that day, until lunch. I sat on a bench in the schools waste of land called a 'courtyard.' I continued reading the book I borrowed from Zack's locker. I don't really think he has noticed it's gone; he has about 50 in there. I ate my lunch alone and fast, as to finish the last 20 pages of Zack's 2,759 pages book in peace.

Finishing the very last page of that fat ass novel, I crammed it in to my book bag, reminding myself to give it back to Zack. Someday. If I really felt like it. Really it was his fault for letting me get into his locker in the first place, forgetful basterd. Like he didn't have enough books already. _Speaking of the little…_

"God damned foul raspy bitch!"

Zack arrived with Freddy nipping at his heels like a lap dog trying to listen in on Zack's cell phone conversation.

"Well, I am the reason you're a pedophile…aren't I?"

"…I knew it!"

A garbled response chattered on the line, become a little louder as they both sat down next to me on the bench. Freddy _giggled _and sat down on my lap without warning. I tried to glare him off but he pouted his way back on anyway. I rolled my eyes at him dramatically and he kissed me on the cheek.

"Well whatever, I know I'm not your only drugged-up teenage boy you love. And Freddy doesn't count "

"…"

'_Who is it?'_

I mouthed to Freddy. He just shook his head and shrugged. We both leaned in closer to the speaker, resting on Zack's shoulder. He leaned away so we just fell on each other Zack the smallest of the threesome, on the bottom. I'm sure this would have been a very comical scene if only I wasn't so eager to hear who was on the other line.

"Oh, you little whore!"

I swear Zack needs to stop acting so…'Billy fabulous.' Today Zack was wearing the normal black, chains (chain leash!), black concert tee. But he was also wearing eyeliner.that wasn't a first, but he only did that when he really want to scare people off. I could just make out the person on the other line saying 'whore' back to him. I was a girl…or woman.

"I'll talk to you how you talk to me Mom."

His Mom? Freddy and I cracked up laughing so hard, and Zack made an attempt to get out from under us. He made it to the flowerbed next to the bench. Oddly enough, he settled there.

"I'm so glad I don't live remotely near you. Just go find they guy and tell him he sucks and your bearing his firstborn child. Make sure to do this at a really bad time of his life. I'm sure he won't commit suicide like dad did."

There was no response. The line went dead. Freddy and me stopped laughing. Zack sighed and slumped farther onto the bench.

Cassandra Johnson walked by glaring at me. She flipped her ponytail and linked arms with her boy toy, Marco, who kind of shrugged at me.

Marco was normal and popular, and if he cared about his friends that were not, he would stop being cared for .I think if Marco started hanging with us again, he would be getting cared for .I wished he would give up his new crew and come back to us. I wish my life were a bit more normal. It looked normal. It looked as though I was dating Freddy. If one just passed by, they would see Freddy resting on the bench, me lying on his chest. A happy punky couple. They wouldn't see lonely girl with her two struggling friends. They wouldn't notice Freddy holding hands with Zack between the bench armrest, rubbing his thumb across the deep scar on Zack's wrist in a gentle affectionate, way. If they did notice they wouldn't care, they wouldn't do anything. Just walk by like Marco. So I gave up on normality. Zack gave up on everything but the band, Freddy, and me. Wasn't new for scars popping up along Zack's wrists. I wasn't sure if he minded I new about his issues, but I had known since the 6th grade. He knew I knew, but didn't care if I didn't mind. But I worried about him. What if he went to deep? What if he OD'd on all the anti-depressant shit his 'concerned step dad' was forcing on him? Or if he simply walked alone in the hall, even for a few minutes he got bashed. I was worried about Freddy too. He was trying so hard to make Zack happy; he hardly had time for schoolwork. He said when Zack was happy, he was happy, but I'm not quite sure. Freddy wasn't really patient, his temper was really unpredictable. What if he got angry with Zack? I was worried this whole teen-age thing was going to suck us all up. We didn't follow the flow, in fear we might get sucked down in the storm drain. What we didn't realize, is, the storm was only starting.

Freddy called me later on the phone, interrupting the nice girls night Marta and me were having.

"WHAT!"I yelled into the phone

"K-Katie?"

"Freddy? It's 12:07, why are you calling?"

He broke down and told me to call and ambulance to the house 3 doors to the left of mine, hanging up without a word. I turned off the TV, and Marta glared at me.

"What the fuck? That's my favorite part!"

"Marta I need you to call the hospital… "She looked around, expecting to see blood everywhere.

"What's wrong did Zack try to slit his wrists agai-?"

"**Let me finish!** " Screamed, panic taking over me. She looked at me like I had punted her baby a few yards.

"Sorry, Marta please just, do you know what to tell them?"

"Zack hurt himself again…"it was more of a statement that a question.

"No. Freddy did."

that sucked!

…review:\


	4. Chapter 4

Sorry about the really long ass wait, I kind of lost myself there. I also don't have a computer, so I'm doing this at school. Hope you all like it, and please review!

I do not own school or rock or Slipknot. if anybody knows how to make this happen please call 1-800- IN-MY-DREAMS.

Summary: follow up to last chapter, senior year.

"Just forget it Freddy…"

"No, I'm not just going to forget it, your hurt, and you need to go to the hospital, now."

"I think I can judge that myself. I'm fine! We both don't need this right now, it will just fuck everything up, and you'll probably go to jail or something."

"Well, I already called Katie." he glared at me, took the phone off the table, and went into the kitchen I heard him call Katie, and tell he everything was fine, he just fell down his basement stairs, and me being a little worry wart, thought he needed medical attention. I decided to let him cool off for a while. I don't know why he is acting like this. 10 minutes later we were fighting like there was no tomarrow, like, all out screaming, pushing , I fucking hate you fighting. He pushed me to hard, literally and figuratively, and he just pissed me off. So I went off on him. Now he's taking my side?

I walked into the kitchen, and saw him sitting on a stool with a package of frozen peas on his face, staring out the patio doors. I sat down next to him. Not sure what was going through his head. I put my hand on his shoulder, and he slapped it away. I sighed.

"Zack I'm sorry. I really am. I don't know what I was thinking."

"I said to forget it Freddy. Just leave me alone."

_Zacks pov, 2 months later_

Not matter how many times I went on stage, I always got those stage jitters. Before I knew it I was hooking up my guitar getting ready. The lights glared on my face. The crowd screamed. I cleared my throat, getting ready. I wasn't used to singing, and playing at the same time.

"I push my fingers into my eyes….it's the only thing that slowly stops the ache….but it's made of all the things I have to take…"

I took me a while to convince the band to play this song, but It's my favorite, out of all those songs I've written. I can feel myself in the song, and all the parts of the song bend together, in a in your face way, like twisted metal covered in rust. I just thought of the one type of music that would piss my steps off more than rock. METAL.

_Freddy's pov._

Zacks voice sent tingling up my spine, emotion a white hot line of energy throughout the song. Lately, he's gotten into his music a lot more. He took some voice lessons, and now he's past puberty, his voice is phenomenal. The set speed by, but at the same time, seems to take forever. Before I knew it, all of us were at the hotel, and I was drunk out of my mind. Me, Zack Katie, Billy, and Ryan, his new boyfriend, were engaged in a game of pool, talking about the bands new style, when dewy popped into the room.

"Guys!!! Listen to this. The record really likes these new songs , and there going to put us on tour!!!"

Ok, crappy place to end, but I don't have time to continue. I'll try to post ASAP, and get as many chappies up by the end of the school year. Nothing really happened in this part, but I have some bits written up at home that will be awesome when I put them together. Review please!


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